Ray Cochran
CW4 Clifton 'Elvis' Wolcott
Dr. Bob
Mark
Michael Berkow
Steve Reeves
Ross Giggins
Damon Schmidt
Adam Fiedler
Doug Hughley
Narrator (voice)
Versace Salesman
Arnie
Herbert Hortz
Lawrence Green
Buddy Israel
Pritchard
Hank Schwartz
Candle Seller
Paul Spericki
Henry Castillo, LAPD
Dean Kansky
Spike
Jerry
Fred Shuster
Roman
Droz
Pete Walston
Billy
Sailor - Freshman
Ty
Don Ready
Det. Steve Menteer
Nervous Quick-Mart Clerk
Black Bellamy (voice)
Danger D'Amo / Tick Tock / Time Keeper
Ron
Armon
Self
Jeremy Piven
Harold McMurphy
Ari Gold
Dr. Paul Higgins
Patrick
Joe Lapchick
Johnny Bunkley
Walter
Harold
Guy
Bob
Thurston Clarque
Jack
Albert Lodge
John
Warden Lucas
Harv (voice)
Patrolman
Noah
Howard Richter
Scawldy
Lenny
Danny
Rock Rivers (voice)
Kahn
Mitchell
Blackie (voice)
Narrator
Vincent
David
Mick
Alan Weiss
Spence Kovak
Jerry Capen
Nicholas
Self - Guest
Nathan Green
Harry Selfridge
Tyler Ward
Self - Host
Elongated Man (voice)
Michael Barth (George)
Jeffrey Tanner
American Football Star (voice)
Brain Pod #57 (voice)
Roland Gaines (voice)
Sidekick